Having trouble getting over your ex and moving on from your breakup? Feeling lost, alone and emotionally exhausted? Don’t panic; this is normal — and better yet, it’s just a temporary phase that will pass with time. However, if the thought of waiting months for your heart to stop aching is not appealing, here are 6 tips and tricks that will help you get over a breakup.
Disclaimer: These things should not be tried within the first few hours following the breakup. You have permission to cry, drink and watch rom-coms for up to 48 hours. After that, it’s time to pick yourself up and dust yourself off.
After the initial breakup, people have a tendency to idolise both their ex and the relationship itself. They look back on all the good moments they shared, all the nice things their partner did for them and, in the process, forget or ignore the times they were unhappy in the relationship. The parts that, in actuality, likely caused the relationship to end.
Painting this false picture will trick you into believing you have lost something better than you actually had, making it even harder to let go and move on. Take off those rose-tinted glasses by sitting down and writing a list of all the things that your partner did that annoyed, upset or angered you. Writing things down will help you gain the perspective you need.
Change Your Space
Move the furniture around, buy a few decorations (maybe some photo frames to fill with pictures of your family and friends) or simply change up your bedding. Creating a space that is yours, and yours alone will help give you a sense of control. So, pack up anything that reminds you of your ex, and store that box somewhere out of sight.
Delete Social Media Accounts
Checking up on your ex following your break up has never been easier. A quick search on social media can reveal, in excruciating detail, what your ex has been up to. However, scrolling through their feeds will only cause further pain and could lead to obsessive stalking. Remove temptation and delete your ex on every social media account. Be ruthless. Once you are done, you will feel more empowered and focused.
See Friends & Family
Don’t shut yourself away from your loved ones during this difficult time. You don’t have to do this alone. Going out with friends or family will distract you from the heartache and remind you to have some fun. If you don’t feel like partying, see this as an opportunity to talk about how you’re feeling. Sharing your thoughts and feelings can help release some of that tension. So, have a night out, go grab a coffee – or glass of wine, whichever you would prefer – or invite your friends over for a movie night.
Focus on Yourself
This may sound cliche, however, taking the time to focus on yourself and your own happiness is integral to your recovery. As humans, we devote a lot of our time to our partners, often leaving little time for ourselves. This becomes evident when the relationship unexpectedly ends. See this as an opportunity to grow and get to know yourself again. Take that language course you have always wanted to take, join a gym class or simply catch up on all the girly TV series or films that your ex would never watch with you.
Give Yourself Time
In the first few weeks following the breakup, you will likely feel upset, angry and confused. It is completely normal to experience this rollercoaster of emotions. Many people suffer from heartache years after a breakup. Why? Because it’s a grieving process.
Evidence shows that people with a broken heart can experience similar emotions to those who are mourning a loved one. In fact, people have even been known to develop a mild form of depression following a breakup. It takes time to move past the devastation and heartache. A broken heart is a phycological injury – an injury that can and will heal if you fight the pain.
The length of time it takes for you to get over your break up is dependent on your mindset and actions – your determination to take control of your emotions. It takes time to move past the devastation and heartache. A broken heart is a phycological injury – an injury that can and will heal if you fight the pain.