Feeling like crap? Here are 10 Negative Characteristics That Cause Misery

Feeling like crap? Here’s a list of 10 negative characteristics or personality traits that cause misery in one’s life. It’s a fact that no one chooses to feel like crap by creating negative personality characteristics intentionally. However, there are many people walking through life miserable, angry, and resentful because of them.
These people can almost certainly never admit that the pain, rage, and disappointment they experience is their fault.
Rather than change the negative aspects of their personalities, they would search for external solutions and blame others for their misery. This is why, in order to counteract the negative parts of our character, we must examine our lives and attitudes with a fine-toothed comb and courageously accept what about us needs to change.

Feeling like crap? It could be because you’re practicing:

Impulsivity

Lack of self-control is a negative characteristic that is particularly prevalent in people who live unbalanced lives and are often feeling life crap. When you are an impulsive person, you cannot allow space between periods of high emotion and periods of important decisions. The danger of being too impulsive is that the most important decisions we will need to take in life are always going to trigger an emotional response. Decisions like who to marry, or whether or not to leave an unfulfilling job – need to be considered with a clear head.

People who are too impulsive end up making regretful mistakes like marrying or hiring the wrong person because of their looks or physical appeal. If you wish to live a happy life, you must learn to distinguish between times of intense emotional entanglement and times when critical choices must be made. When you don’t feel like it, learn to take a step back. At times of intense emotion, question and reflect upon yourself and attempt to understand why you are feeling the way you are. Balancing your life like this will give you a greater feel about what you need to do at the right time.

Feeling like crap? maybe it’s because you have Excuses!?

Another defining trait of people who lead a life they hate are feeling like crap is finding reasons to do only what’s convenient for them.Here’s the interesting thing about excuses: They all seem valid. If I tell you that the reason I’m angry, miserable, and resentful is that I lost someone close to me when I was 15, it seems valid.
But chances are, there are lots of people who came out even stronger and better after experiencing painful circumstances.
On the other hand, the benefit of making excuses is that you can use them to improve.

How? Instead of giving reasons to be average, poor, and lazy, tell yourself why you are supposed to be in a better place because of your circumstances. You’ve probably read success stories from people who only achieved success after hitting rock bottom. In other words, the same conditions that caused others to give up were the catalysts for their success.
Recognise that making excuses only leads to further misery, and the habit will only make life easier for you now, but it will inevitably make it more difficult for you in the future.

Make excuses to do better, not worse.

Negative Perception

Life events are neither good nor bad. What we call good and bad are simply words we apply on our own perceptions. The truth is that your life experience is dictated by your perception, not by your circumstances. Imagine these two scenarios: A young man moves to a new town where everything is strange. He immediately gets demoralised because he knows no one, doesn’t understand their language, and doesn’t like the food.

On the other hand, a lady moves into a new town and gets excited because she thinks it will be amazing to meet new people, taste something different, and visit all sorts of strange places. Despite the fact that these two people are in the same position, their experiences would be opposite. Develop a positive eye towards your experiences in life. It changes everything.

Rigidity

One of the most important personality traits needed to grow in life is behavioural flexibility. A flexible person can adapt to any situation and do what’s needed. Rigid people, on the other hand, have a hard time letting go. They cling to their beliefs and sometimes negative perceptions of life which leave them feeling like crap.
They make decisions based on what they already believe, not what should be done based on the reality in front of them.
The effect of this is that they never grow. Their stubbornness to try new things makes them unable to change themselves, even for the better. Understand that life is always changing. Those who are always improving themselves are those who are ready to pay attention to life and update their views when there is a need.

Ingratitude

Humans have a tendency to trivialise what is readily available. In reality, most of us judge the importance of something based on how difficult it was to obtain. We think it’s not that necessary important if it’s readily accessible.
Vital aspects of our lives like family, health, good friends, etc., are often ignored because we don’t have to struggle to have them.
We obsess over the lives of celebrities on their social media pages, some drowning in envy because they wish switching lives were possible. However, relying on availability or scarcity to decide what is necessary or worthwhile can only lead to disappointment in the long run.
Why? It’s an endless loop. A more logical choice will be to look at things you already have now and imagine how things would have been if you never had them. Learn to appreciate what’s available when it’s available.

You don’t have to lose a thing before you appreciate its value.

Boredom avoidance

One negative personality trait that makes people miserable and feeling like crap is the dread of boredom.
Why? Life can never be exciting all the time. People who always go after novelty discover sooner or later that they are chasing an illusion. There will be moments in your life where your capacity to deal with misery will determine how far you progress. You must learn to accept that sometimes life can be slow.

Relationships can sometimes feel boring. Your job isn’t going to feel exciting all the time, or at least not as you had expected.
The bottom line is that one of the most impressive qualities needed for life balance is the ability to navigate the slowness of life with understanding and poise. Enjoy the moment where things are moving quickly with excitement and enthusiasm. Enjoy the sense of novelty when you start something different. On the other hand, when there is apathy or boredom, don’t be too quick to suppress the feeling. It’s a part of life. Sit back and learn to master yourself in that boredom.

Balancing life like this will give you more mastery over yourself and life in general.

Not Taking Responsibility

This is a subtle negative personality trait to be aware of. Those who are always distributing faults will find well-crafted explanations as to why nothing is their fault. Shifting blame is a problem because it prevents emotional maturity.
You remain a baby emotionally and intellectually because growth requires the ability to face one’s self and look at one’s shortcomings.
When you can acknowledge your role in the chaos in your life, then there is the hope of making noticeable improvement.

Taking responsibility gives you a focus, and direction to channel yourself towards improvement.

Learn to look within yourself anytime things don’t happen the way you want. Ask yourself what you could have done to make things better. Looking at your experiences this way will make you a much more fulfilled person.

Pursuing Positive Experiences

Paradoxically, the pursuit of only positive experiences is in itself a negative personality trait. One of the central ideas in Mark Manson’s book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck, is that the more we pursue negative experiences, the less happy we become. He explained that the best way to have a balanced life is to accept one’s negative feelings.

It makes sense that we like to have positive experiences. Feeling good has mistakenly become synonymous with leading a happy life.
We feel if we’re feeling like crap, depressed, anxious, sad, broken, betrayed, bored, or bitter, even for a moment, there’s something wrong with us.

This mentality causes us look for more excitement, because this way, we can prove to ourselves and others that our lives are really fabulous! But living in this way unfortunately isn’t just impractical, it’s also exhausting.
Learn to accept your feelings. Don’t label them, listen to them. Be comfortable watching them come and go.
There’s nothing bad about feeling down sometimes, bad things do happen and your feelings are warranted.

Not Accepting People for who They are

Most activities we do in life are going to involve others. Often, our moments of extreme emotions are triggered by our interactions with others. Those who do not know how to be flexible with their own ideas and uphold the ideas of others usually get into all sorts of unnecessary friction in social situations.
As easy as it is for us to think that our ideas are the best and that the values we carry are the most correct, we must learn to accept people as they are if we are going to live in peace with them.

Feeling like crap because you’re seeking Approval

To a degree, we are all somewhat concerned about what others think of us.
It’s normal human behaviour to want people to like you. But what’s not normal is to want everyone to like you.
People who care too much about approval end up being pushed in all directions.

They easily get emotionally exhausted and will be feeling like crap because humans are constantly changing, and trying to please them is impossible. Approval seekers don’t have a balanced internal evaluation of themselves, causing them to seek external approval to feel good. This negative personality trait brings all sorts of emotional turmoil and confusion in the long run. A better alternative is to know yourself. Refer less to others when you think about your own value and worth.

Let’s wrap this up!

These 10 negative characteristics have caused everyone to feel like crap at some point, and this doesn’t mean we are all miserable losers. As Goethe once said,

“Everyone has an aspect to their nature which will of necessity give offense if they were to express it openly.”

There is no such thing as perfect. Simply apply what you’ve learned to become aware of these characteristics in your behaviour for the purpose of new habits and changing yourself for the better.

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